Embracing Fear as an Ally - Pathways to Mastery

With hosts Tracey Meinen and Lucy Hunter. 

Fear doesn't have to be an adversary. It can be a powerful messenger guiding you towards personal growth and self-mastery. Join us on this transformative journey with Tracy Meinen, who shares her profound experiences of surrendering to fear and using it as a tool for self-awareness and healing. Through our conversation, we unravel the complex nuances of fear and anxiety, learning how to face them with presence and surrender rather than allowing them to control our lives.

Throughout this episode, we delve into Tracy's insights on how unattended aspects of our lives contribute to ongoing fears and anxieties. By exploring the mind's tendency to seek problems in the face of fear, we uncover techniques to redirect focus towards the heart and breath, creating a serene space for healing. Tracy emphasizes the coexistence of fear and love as complementary forces, rather than failures, enriching our journey toward emotional equilibrium. We also discuss how past life traumas can influence our present experiences and how Akashic blueprint readings and visualization practices can help clear these deep-seated fears.

Our discussion expands into the healing power of self-compassion and patience as we navigate the echoes of past traumas and the illusions created by fear. Tracy provides practical techniques for grounding and reestablishing safety, transforming fear from an obstacle into an ally. We conclude with the importance of daily self-check-ins to foster emotional presence and growth. This insightful exploration with Tracy Meinen is not just about overcoming fear—it's about embracing it as a gateway to deeper personal mastery. Join us as we open the doors to healing and self-discovery, with the courage to ask for guidance and support along the way.

Lucy Hunter is an oracle for the human blueprint, showing people how to work with theirs to heal and transform core patterns and scripts and align with their signature and soul purpose.

Lucy has been reading and coaching with the blueprint-Akash for 16 years, supporting empaths and the energy aware to embody their gifts and abilities, reclaim their energy sovereignt

Chapters

• 0:00 Navigating Fear and Self-Mastery
• 14:32 Navigating Fear and Embracing Healing
• 22:53 Clearing Past Life Trauma and Fear
• 33:15 Overcoming Fear Through Self-Compassion
• 44:50 Navigating Fear With Self-Compassion
• 52:22 Daily Check-in for Self-Healing

Transcript

Lucy: 0:20

so lovely to sit with you today, tracy.

Tracey: 0:22

Honestly, it really is I know it's always nice to get together and just chat right I was really thinking about what you were saying as well.

Lucy: 0:31

We were talking about fear last time we met and I was thinking about how you I think of you as being like a pioneer in this and because of what you face, because of your bravery of what you face, because of your bravery of what you've been with, of when your trauma comes up, that so often fear is the frequency that you're facing and that you must have found that space within yourself to be able to face it and walk through the fear and to really embody that ability to kind of feel the fear and do it anyway.

Lucy: 1:12

As they say, it's a real easy thing to say, but when your whole nervous system is going into that state, things actually happen. To counteract being able to move, being able to think, being able to move, being able to think, being able to, to take a higher perspective, to, being able to remember the map, to center the pathway home to that place of grace is that everything in your body is actually kind of fighting all that and doing the very opposite of what would be supportive. So I think it, especially when there's fear to face, for me it feels like I just want to take my hat off to you and bow down to this ability you have well, thank you, I almost feel like I had to surrender to it.

Tracey: 1:58

Um, and this happened about three months ago when I was experiencing such tremendous we'll call it. It was just like this part of me, I guess, like the internal battle we all face all the time, but it became very present to me. It's like my internal world, all of a sudden, just there was nothing. It was like I just became so present with what was actually happening within me. It's like my internal world, all of a sudden, just there was nothing. It was like I just became so present with what was actually happening within me and I couldn't not deal with it. So it's almost like it brought me to my knees and I got to this place of just such a deep surrender, surrender and and I just remember, like asking for guidance and help with how to handle what I was feeling and I think, meet this energy, to meet it with, just like that opens. You know, like clearly I asked for help, but it was in that, I think, asking for help and being open to face whatever was there, something just happened in my system.

Tracey: 3:30

It was like I went so deep in.

Tracey: 3:36

You know, we worked on it afterwards and it was in that opening, that it like rebuilt this foundation, you know, and and it's weird because, like you saying that to me, it's like, yeah, now I realize that that's what happened it was like I had to fall or go so deep within myself of the fear, while still being held and experiencing what that was like, and to feel the fear and, as you say, move through it anyway, because I didn't really have a choice. Um well, I mean, we have a choice, but my choice was I knew this was something I needed to meet. It was part of my pathway forward and in really like just meeting it and surrendering to whatever, like you're saying, the physical, because I remember sitting in an activation that was assisting me in, you know, moving forward in my journey and I remember I was literally trembling, my physical body was shaking because I could feel the terror and again it was like all this stuff coming up again about reconnecting to myself and you know, what had happened in the past was coming forward.

Tracey: 5:05

but I knew that I really needed to keep going, yeah, and and it was almost like just like to keep going and then know how to be there for myself. In it it just built that foundation of you know, like you're saying, where I can always come into this center, even when things are really scary on the external, and I know that what I have been through within myself, I am available to myself in all ways. You know it's like I became in all ways. You know it's like I became really strong for myself in that and it was like I just started to see fear as more of a messenger and it was more inquiring. What is it that? You know? Because again I wanted to.

Tracey: 6:01

My ultimate goal is like I want transparency within myself. I don't want any parts of myself to go unseen or to be in shadow. I want to bring them all all home and within that it was just like I think I made a vow to myself to, you know, be able to see and feel every part and yeah, that's not easy. And, again, what you shared with me was extremely helpful around the you know, when we are healing on that, the physical level of fear because, like you said, it will come up and it becomes so in your face. So can you speak to that again why it's different than you know, like fear. Fear because it's like this will, like you're saying, literally pulls you into that trauma.

Lucy: 6:59

Well, that's exactly it. I mean, when we're healing anything. For me, it's important to remember who we are. Who am I? Am I my trauma? Am I the one in the story? Am I a character playing out this role, or am I the witnessing, benevolent, compassionate consciousness that's aware of the story, that steps back from it, that can see myself as the creator and the author of my own scripts?

Lucy: 7:28

When fear plays out and it, you know, it exists in the body. For me, that's the real challenge, because it's wherever my seat of consciousness is. That's what I'm going to be reading as real. That's what I'm going to be reading as real. That's what I'm going to be referencing as the more real. And when, when fear's got a grip of my body and it's increased my heart rate or it's causing, you know, tremors throughout my body, or I can't name all the different symptoms that happen, because they're different depending on what the cut, what the intensity of the fear is. When it comes, you know, does it come at three o'clock in the morning and wake me up, or does it come when I'm walking down the street, or is it connected to something that's going on in my life right now, or is it abstract and intangible. Um is it? Does it come in a moment, or is it a prolonged background state that kind of sits with me, it keeps me company during the day. It's.

Tracey: 8:28

It's got many faces and many colors and I think that's important to speak to that right.

Lucy: 8:35

It's hard. First of all, it's identifying that it's there because it can create, when it's sitting in the background, kind of like little gremlin on the shoulder, I don't even notice that my, my whole body might be tensing up against an invisible enemy or an invisible threat. Rather, that actually isn't real, isn't there and is me processing some things that I haven't stopped to realize that I'm processing. There's a number of different ways that fear can creep up on me, and sometimes it's it's bold and terrifying, and sometimes it's insidious and it's in the background. But one of the things I think they've all got in common is when I feel fear, um, it's physical. For me it's a physical experience and the body tends to be loudest in terms of pulling the attention into. This is where you are right now, lucy. This is what's happening for you right now. This is what the more real is.

Lucy: 9:33

Yeah, and the fear response tends to induce a kind of the way my body responds to fear is designed to get me to pay attention, so to shift my seat of attention into my body, to recognize it as the real. You know, it's designed to speak loudly to my consciousness, to recognize as a threat and to get me to invest in that threat as real. So I take some kind of action. You know we talk about fight, flight or freeze and all the different things that will kick in.

Lucy: 10:03

And when the fear is really strong, when I'm experiencing any flavor of fear and there's an intensity to it, it's like I'm constantly having to remind myself to take that step back, to remember, to consciously shift my attention to my center, to consciously fall into that space beyond what's happening in my physical senses. Now it's wonderful training for that. It's a wonderful training to have an intense experience, a tense experience that's physical and sensory, and still take that step back and remember that this is not the more real. It's actual, it is actually happening, something is actually happening, but it's not the more real. There's still an availability, like you say, to find that I would call it creator space in this instance, create a space in this instance, and um.

Tracey: 11:14

So I think it takes a level of mastery that requires practice over time. Yeah, it's building that muscle of being with it, and I think where that starts is and I don't think our society is comfortable with this and it's really every day checking in with oneself and how are we feeling? And you know, I feel like that's something that I, I just do every day because I can't not do it now. Um, yeah, and it's like, and I and I think that's something that is so important and not to label or judge what we're actually feeling, cause again, like you say, it's coming up to be a witness, to be expressed. Um, and again, they're really, you know, they're really. And again, there, really, you know, there, really, there really isn't anything that we can't handle. And, yes, sometimes we do need to have some support, but again, you know, I don't think running from it or suppressing it or wanting to feel a different way. That just puts it back in the subconscious and it just makes it louder the next time.

Tracey: 12:32

So, yeah, I mean there is a certain level of courage to you know, choose to face it. But I feel like every time, you know we do that, we chip away and it's like we, you know, really come into our power through that, because I was thinking about, you know, how is it that I've gotten to the point where I do recognize my light? And it has been all of those little, and I don't know if I want to call them battles with the illusionary parts of myself. But all of that, you know going wait, well, this isn't really me right now, or I mean, this isn't really reality for me. And it's like every time it's almost like I gain momentum within that true nature of myself and it's like like you just get more and more aware of that true alignment that you actually hold. And so it's like every time you exercise that courage, it really does build the, that foundation. I guess, right, we're going back to the foundation of self.

Lucy: 13:46

Right. It becomes easier and easier to recognize when the fear is related to something that requires attention and action to be taken and when the fear is coming from something unhealed that's inside, that's been triggered by goodness knows what and that trigger has caused a pattern to run, which has caused a pattern to run, which has caused a response to happen in the system. And the system is replaying a response to an event that's not happening now. And it takes practice and discernment to recognize that my fear that's whatever fear or anxiety is running in the body, um, is a vibrational response to an event that's happened, that's that's not happening now. So, first of all, you've got to have discernment, though. Well, is the event happening now? Because sometimes we say fear is a messenger to let you know.

Lucy: 14:32

Hey, there's something unattended in your life that you've been ignoring that's giving you anxiety and you go. Do you do actually need to go and find out what that is and address it? All right. So quite often when I have this come up, I'm like, okay, I'll do a quick check, like, well, all right, what am I ignoring in my life? Is there anything that is unattended that I need to bring attention to that I've been shoving under the carpet. I'll go through that checklist and arrive at is it like okay? Is this fear existential? Is this fear related to a pattern that's running? Is this fear because there's some action for me to take that I'm in resistance to? And it's knowing what questions to ask yourself like what is this fear relating to? What is this anxiety relating to, and is it really true?

Tracey: 15:19

I love that.

Tracey: 15:19

I love that Because you know what I feel, like you know we were talking when we were originally talking about this topic. What's unfortunate is there's so much polarity, even within the spiritual community, around fear and love and I feel like they're all allowed to be felt. You know, it's not like it's either fear or love, it's like I don't. I don't want people to come to think that if they feel fear somehow they're inherently failing at this Because, like we've talked about, you need to feel all of it. Like that is the part of healing. You know, healing is feeling and if you, if you don't honor, you know what is coming up for you.

Tracey: 16:02

Or and again I would just I want to emphasize, like cause I feel, like so many times in my experience I was like, oh my God, I'm feeling fear, I mustn't be doing something wrong or I must be wrong or I'm, you know, and it's like anything I want to impart to people it's, it's perfectly normal in this healing process to go through feeling physical fear and it is part of this journey and it's like you have to embrace that. And again, it's it's to feel is a really good thing. And, like you said, the discernment, because, again, the mind can also take it and run with it. So you have to be really mindful of, I think, like you said, like where you're experiencing it is in the body or has it started to go to the mind and then the mind can take it and run with it. Can you talk to that, that a little Lucy, like I really want to, because it's in my awareness.

Lucy: 17:05

It's something that happens when fear, when there's, when I'm aware of any kind of fear in me, I will notice that the mind will react as though, oh, action needs to be taken and a problem needs to be solved. Hey, I'm up, this is my job, and so my mind will activate, my thoughts will activate and, quite frankly, if it's background fear, like it's an anxiety that I don't know what it's related to, or if it's to do with a pattern that's running, something from my past which has been triggered, which is moving through me and I'm healing that, or if it's in relation to there's something I don't want to see, there's something, there's an action I've got to take in my life, I've got to step up, I've got to do something that terrifies me and I'm blinding myself to it. If the cause of the fear is not known to my mind, what happens is my mind gets activated. It goes all right, problem to solve, action to take. We don't know what the problem is or what the action to take is, and a wheel starts running and then it runs, and it runs faster and faster and faster, and that wheel pulls my attention out of my heart. It pulls my attention out of my body and it brings my attention. So the seat of awareness is in my mind, but it's not in my pure mind, it's not in my still place, it's not in the spacious mind or the witness consciousness, it's just spinning. It's a hamster in a wheel going ah, it's causing more problems and it's got a frequency of ah which just really makes things worse.

Lucy: 18:37

Yes, so that requires discernment to notice oh, that's happening. What do I do about that? Well, there's a pathway, there's a map back out with that, like you say, into into embodiment. I will consciously make an intention to place my attention, my heart, to listen to my breathing to, to be in the center and in my heart where my heartbeat is, to come home, to that inner, safe space where things are calm, quiet, spacious, regardless of what's happening in my system, my body, my brain, regardless of what's happening around me, regardless of the past or the future.

Lucy: 19:19

So a lot of fear is based on an invisible future that I can't see. And when I'm looking into a future that I can't see, what do I do? I take my attention out of my centre and I place it somewhere ahead of myself in something fictional, something intangible, illusory. It's not helpful. And what I'm actually doing, then, is creating from fear. Now I have a lot of I've made a lot of requests to guidance, to my highest self, to spirit over the years to say you know, I'm an invoked, this I am not creating from my fears.

Lucy: 19:55

My fears are here to be healed. What's rising in me is not here to create my reality. It's here to be healed. So I call for this fear-based part of me to be held in grace, whatever pattern is running right now. I call for this to be held in grace because it's a lot to be experiencing the fear as a vibration, to have that moving through the system at whatever level and whatever shape it wants to take, to have the seat of attention being pulled to like my head, or into the future or somewhere or wherever it's going, then to be aware of that happening. That's already quite a lot, yeah, to be dealing with, and it's really nice at this point to just go help.

Lucy: 20:36

Actually, I really hire self. All it is god, goddess, all it is source, who, whoever you invoke with you about your angels, your guides, your guardians love god, whoever you invoke, just to say at this point help, help me center, help me back to safety and I call on the infinite love of all that is to re-establish harmony in whatever is causing my fear right now and to hold this frightened part of me in grace and to show me clearly what's true, what's not. If I can't get myself back, if making that intention to follow the map and I'm going to bring my my attention back to my heart and center, I'm going to bring my attention back to my heart and center. I'm going to bring my attention back to my breath. I'm going to place my attention in the physical sensations in my body right now, and I'm not to identify them, not to name them, not to fix them or resolve them, just to be there and be aware of my body as a whole. And this breath.

Lucy: 21:45

Safety is simplicity. For me, it's centering and being with the simple and freeing myself from the need to resolve my fear, freeing myself from the need to identify its cause, all of these things, but to re-stabilize and then, from that place, like I say, if I can't do that, I will ask for help. Until I can do that and when I can do that, it's exactly what you're talking about. For me, it's that right. I'm going to divorce the vibration from the story. This fear might be relating to something that's actually happening. It might be relating to my past, something for healing that's been triggered, a record in my cache that's been opened. It might be, like you say, fear of stepping up into something, a resistance. Whatever it is, I'm going to divorce the vibration from the story and that way the story actually turns into something that serves me, because it's brought this vibration into my body. It's like OK, hello you. No-transcript, yes, you're back.

Tracey: 28:16

We were on a roll.

Lucy: 28:22

Yeah, and I would love to hear what the guides have to say as well on this topic. Yeah, there is so much to cover on this. We will open to a channeling, but first so yeah, that's what I'm saying.

Tracey: 28:39

Thank, you, I'm helping you ground in.

Lucy: 28:43

Yeah, am I Okay ground in so now it's really nice just to move through it. I mean, the everything cut out there for a moment and it was just like, why is my equipment going against me right now? And it's an exact example of what we're just talking about and what we're just looking at. Basically, I have a relationship with technology where it is responsive and I would love to say that I've come to a happy place where it's responsive to my creative directive, where it's we're getting on really well, where it's really paving the way for me to broadcast and bring through what I'm here to bring through. That's not what's happening right now. Ok, my relationship with technology right now is actually reflecting a hardwired permission blocker On being able to broadcast and it comes from exactly what we're talking about.

Lucy: 30:11

This comes from the deepest level of terror in me. It's not this life is. I mean, I've had echoes of the original event in this life. This is past life and it's a real, important past life for me. It's an oracle past life and it's how the oracle ship ended for myself and jiva and who's an incarnation of the first oracle of delphi now we were together and how this ended for us. There was a horrible, horrible instance and just over the years where we've been working together. Thank you for holding this in your heart. It really helps. Yeah, over the years we've been working together, I have these cataclysm moments where something comes back from this, this ending of that and it's so I can.

Tracey: 30:56

I can relate. I have something similar, but this is for you. But I have something. I know exactly what you're talking about.

Lucy: 31:02

Yeah, right and we are not alone in this, yeah and I have you know business. It's tricky business and it's again coming back to the body. For me, it's like I have cleared this fear from calling other dimensions of myself. I've opened the akasha, my blueprint in other dimensions of the self, and this fear has been risen up and been dissolved and, like I say, I've had cataclysm moments in my life that give me an echo, and then the event in my life is nothing, but it manages to trigger that response, those harmonics.

Tracey: 31:35

It's still in the body is what you're saying, you think well, these like a cellular.

Lucy: 31:41

Yeah, it's now the past events I'm talking about. It wasn't exactly in the body that it was clearing. It was clearing from, like I say, other dimensions and they were strong enough to floor me, whereas what I'm aware of now is that it's like it's opening from the physical dimensions of my body, the Akasha.

Tracey: 31:58

That's what I mean. That's what I mean, cause I think that's what's happening for me as well. Yes, it's clearing that.

Lucy: 32:04

Yeah, yeah, I really think it it is. And the memory of dying for speaking dying too, that's horribly is the records are opening for me. Bodies are cash. Yeah, and the grace in this is that I'm not having a repeat experience. No one's come and cut my head off with an axe. It's great. But I'm not tempting fate here when I say this, but, um, my body has a memory like oh, something was coming through earlier and Nina, who's helping with all of this and helping hold the vision of what we're here to bring in and what we can share and how this can all grow, what we've been doing together in private, in a small group. And she just said to me love it. Um, imagine, just imagine a vision. Visualize and like this large event with lots and lots of people where you're speaking and I was. I felt an axe wound in my left shoulder and she's like imagine how that would feel I was like.

Lucy: 33:07

Well, currently it feels like I've got an axe lodged in my left shoulder and that was just one instant from the event, the trauma event. That's the big record moving here and, like you're saying, it's not just that one event, that one event has had echoes throughout. Of course, yeah, my iterations, my other lives, those are also lodged in your cache. But this is like the root and origin and the fear has. I can't just think my way through this, I can't just, it's so crazy.

Tracey: 33:37

you're saying this because I've been experiencing a very similar thing, and mine is around people having been harmed, um, and it's almost like every it would just pop up where I'm like, oh my God, this person could be harmed physically. You know, it's like that, always taking you out of safety because you feel like something, somebody could be harmed, somebody could be hurt, and and it's like it will just pull me. I'm like what the hell and same?

Lucy: 34:03

I've done so much work clearing all the things, but I think it's very much still moving out of the physical, and this is what I mean about how much tenacity it takes, how much courage it takes, how much practice it takes to constantly come home and remember that this is not real. This is not happening now. Right, because, as I say, as the records move from the physical Akash, the body is receiving the information that the bad thing is happening right now and, of course, the rest of our senses are telling us no, it's not. And the mind, the mind, is pulling us like. We're here right now. We're here right now and Gabor Martin will talk a lot about very beautiful things.

Lucy: 34:46

I'm open to his work a lot, but I've had bits of it come my way and one of my favorite things is reestablishing animal safety for the body in those moments and the real, simple things. I'm not going to quote him because I will get it wrong, but the principles that I've received Do you want to record this, by the way it's recording? Okay, record this, by the way it's recording, okay. The principle that I've received um are um, when the fear is running, when that's been triggered any level, to use those senses, to use your eyes, to use a sense of touch, sight, sound and take a note and place the attention in the body, be physically present, feel the feelings in the body as a whole, which is what we're saying earlier, and and reference your physical environment. So feel where. For me, it's a case of. This is what I decided for myself is to feel the seat that I'm sitting on Me too.

Lucy: 35:57

Yeah, feel the gravity of what's holding me, feel when my feet are on the floor, check where the walls are, the door is, and then take a mental note of like, hang on a minute. In this moment, in this space, I'm actually physically safe right now and although it sounds stupid and the mind's like, oh, of course you're not, it's not to me at all when you've experienced trauma.

Tracey: 36:22

That's not yeah, that makes a lot of sense, doesn't it Well, for people that know that's not? Yeah, that makes a lot of sense, doesn't it Well, for people that know what it's like, especially people that are sensitive to energy, and how quickly you could be pulled out and you're like you said you just feel the energy of something that needs to move.

Lucy: 36:39

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But this is where the mind can become an ally rather than just a spinning wheel, because the mind it's always good to. I think, to give my mind and my thought processes uh, my thought process is a job to do. I love that right. Well, your job now is to remind me, to take check of my environment, to remind myself that I'm safe, to remember the map back to my center, to remember the instruction list, basically for what to do, and then I have a useful mind. I don't have a frequency running in the background, not how you don't have your mind hindering the process. Right, it can help or it can hinder. It's going to be doing something, so why not give it the right thing to do? I?

Tracey: 37:21

love that. I think that's really good. That's so brilliant.

Lucy: 37:34

So the beauty of this and the majesty of actually facing your fears and being beyond them and taking that action anyway, is what? If I look in my life right now? The invisible fear that I haven't acknowledged and I haven't allowed into my body. The other thing is, I can stifle those fears and not give them space. The invisible fear has been stopping me from fulfilling my purpose and growing the gift. I've got, the offering that's coming through me, and it's like this offering isn't Lucy's offering.

Lucy: 38:02

I might be guardian of something and I'm not even guardian of the whole offering. I am guardian of a small part of a large creation that involves many consciousnesses, many beautiful humans, many beautiful guides, and I've just got this small part to play. And if I let my fear win, if I don't face it, if I don't feel it, if I don't move through it, then I'm the spanner in the works, I'm the one holding everything up. I'm getting in the way. And I don't mean to say that to be unkind to myself, because actually I really believe in being very loving and compassionate with that frightened part of myself, but I do mean to say that to really emphasize the importance of facing the fear inside.

Lucy: 38:48

Yeah, and it's not enough to just face it. The whole system is designed. Our innate intelligence, the consciousness we are, operates as a whole, and that whole innate intelligence will arrange itself so that if we're not safe, if, if we're not supported, we won't access the fear, it won't move. We will protect ourselves against it, we'll blind ourselves or block it, or it won't be allowed. So when fear does actually start to surface tangible or intangible, abstract or known when it it starts to surface, it's a really good sign. It's a sign that we are actually in a space where we can physically, emotionally, mentally and energetically start to move through this, to let this vibration rise up and move out.

Tracey: 39:44

I love that.

Lucy: 39:45

That needs to be said, yeah yeah, and it's actually a good sign that it's it's moving at all in the system. It can be. I don't want to dismiss um, that's when it's healthy, that's when it's aligned, that's when it's helpful. I don't want to dismiss the experience of fear where it overcomes and it overwhelms and it's no longer helpful. That's right. Yeah for sure, this is yeah. When we're working with it in this way, there is that opportunity, um. But the other thing I want to speak to is this it's like being the ocean or being a drop in the ocean, but in this context, when a fear pattern of mine is rising up and it tells my body that it's happening now, the bad thing is happening now and my mind actually doesn't have enough information to get helpful and to process it, I can become the tiny. The tiny one overwhelmed by this giant experience has taken over my senses. That's interrupting my ability to think properly. The I become the victim within my own story, and that's not a judgment.

Tracey: 40:59

That's very real.

Lucy: 41:00

Right, because all my all, yeah, the seat of awareness has fallen into it. The story has become real. I've become a player in my own story. I've fallen out of witness consciousness. It's like a reenactment. It's like a reenactment, yeah, thank you. And then I can't remember. I'm the author. Now, there's no judgment for me on those moments. When that happens, it's usually because the feelings that I need to move are so strong that I it's like I backed away from them so far that I have to go into them to gather the gifts, to have the responses. I need to have to let go of the attachments that are keeping me invested in the original story and it will get that trauma moving. Now I don't want to stay in that place for too long because it's disempowering. I've become stuck in it and if I start investing in the story as the real thing, then I've lost my ability to heal myself. But for a time when things are real, strong, and that's like I say, those are the moments when I kind of help anyone.

Tracey: 42:01

That's so important to be with, and especially when you're on this path and you're learning how to do this, there's going like that's again, that coming back to compassion from oneself, because it's never going to be. You know, you have to have those times where you're playing in it to um know that you can pull yourself out of it. You know this is all like we were saying that, building that muscle. So I love that you speak to that, because that's really important to share with people as well.

Lucy: 42:27

You know it's turning fear into a gift, and it's just when I, when I feel fear in my world, I need help. So I just want to share a quick story. Um of this is luckily for me. This was just one moment where this happened. I wasn't on my own. I was on the phone with someone. I had help. I was called to go on a country road for a long walk at dusk, and I do. I did it.

Lucy: 42:54

I love this, this landscape where I live right now, because this would happen every so often. I would be sitting in like asking this question, what's now? And I'm just feel this impulse. I've got to go out somewhere. There's something for me out there. All right, I'm going out, that's it. So, and this, this landscape, for me, is a magical fairy tale land where I can connect to the consciousnesses in the mountains. So the dragon consciousness, the troll consciousness, is the gnomes. It's a very elementally alive landscape. I have a lot of fun with it and I was with a master who taught me how to connect to those consciousnesses and channel them. So I'm talking to her on the phone. I've just gone and found this troll and I'm looking at it going oh my god, I think there's a.

Lucy: 43:38

This is a troll, this is a. Really. I'm really feeling the sentient consciousness in this part of the mountain and, my friends, she starts channeling and as she starts channeling for, for the, you know, for the consciousness that's I'm connecting to, things are opening in my field and there is this remembrance in me that connects to the part of me that evolved through that kingdom within the planet. You know, it's really beautiful stuff. And then suddenly she just says and they're saying that's enough right now, and I'm like why, why, why would that be enough, you know, and it's I forget.

Lucy: 44:16

When we have, I have, these reconnective experiences, the connecting with any kind of beautiful truth or beautiful remembrance of oneness and interconnectivity with all life and all dimensions, up comes a load of stuff to process, up comes, you know, my collected, accumulated memories of falling into forgetting, of how I became disconnected to that landscape, how I forgot that I was one at this elemental level.

Lucy: 44:44

Anyway, I forget this, I'm doing why? Why did that need to stop? And we carry on talking for a few minutes and suddenly I realize I feel this kind of prickling on the back of my neck and I'm like it's time to go, I've got to go and I stand up and suddenly full-on psychotropic landscape experience. The landscape has suddenly become a nightmare landscape. The trees suddenly look gnarly and evil and like they are looming towards me and I can feel the energy coming off them is like evil and scary and suddenly I'm in a set of a horror film. I'm in a set of a horror film and I'm like well, how, what? This isn't real. But real or not, everything suddenly looked absolutely terrifying and it was a nightmare experience in a daytime. You know, walking around with my eyes, I've had this.

Lucy: 45:39

I've had something like that as well, yeah yeah, freaky, and it just took over my whole body, or my fear took over my whole body and I. I was absolutely terrified, the same way I have been as a child, having nightmares, and I was so grateful I was on the phone at that moment and it's like right, okay. What I need to remember here is this is where the mind became my ally. This is not real. This is an illusion. I'm not seeing the truth. Somewhere in myself, I forgot that everything is love. I fell into a disconnect where I became afraid of the elemental. I became afraid of this dimension of consciousness and since then I've been telling myself a story that this is something to fear, and right now my whole landscape is is visually fulfilling that projection. And I had to look at that when I was terrified and having a nightmare and alone on this long road at night where there's a long walk back to civilization and um and I had to remember, like this is not true.

Lucy: 47:00

I'm looking at love, love that I have turned into, not love. And I have to remember right now that the truth of this is love and everything else is my imposition. And the minute I kind of anchored in that everything dissolved and it was all right. But my word, it was scary. I was walking down the road. Just the trees looked like how they had hands that were trying to get like I'm picturing it.

Tracey: 47:27

Yeah, I see it like you know.

Lucy: 47:29

Movie fear comes for me in many very basic modern day. The modern day world is is enough full enough of fear to need not to need nightmares as well. But that happened and, um, yeah, I was.

Tracey: 47:45

I needed a friend in that moment because, even though I had to walk myself back to truth I don't know if I could have done it if I was alone I was just really grateful that it wasn't but that's true and it's like that's what's wonderful about you know, each one of us to support, you know, each through this, because we're all going to have our own experiences of what comes up for us and to know again that it's okay, you know, and that we've all created and we all hold interesting beliefs.

Tracey: 48:19

That, you know, again, we can choose to re-evaluate. Yes, and I had a very similar moment out in the woods one time and I again my outer reality had this fearful, like something could happen to me, and I just said show me the truth of this. And instantly it was gone. And so again, you know, we do have the power and that's the important part to uh, realize, and again I was asking to be shown. So it's like whenever, like you said, asking for the support, you know that's so important and we will be given it, you know. And, like you said, um I forget in another conversation um being open to how it's going to come to us, you know.

Lucy: 49:14

Tracy, thank you so much. I so much I want to talk about. It'd be really nice to um to open to a channeling on this, but actually it's not quite the right frequency in this moment. So we will revisit that with the channeling option and connecting with guides as well. For now, it's just been really beautiful to dip a toe into this huge topic yeah, it really is vast.

Tracey: 49:40

Yeah, it's vast, but I feel like what we did was help people break down um some of the bits of it, so it's not so overwhelming if you know you do start to work with this and you do start to open up to your own um, your own experience, and to know that you're fully supported, you know that's the phrase.

Lucy: 50:02

Well, I've been working with the latest kind of wall of fear. That's that's ready for clearing right now. That's the phrase that's carrying me, is remembering. I'm fully supported. It's what my guidance keeps bringing me. I'm fully supported through this. Yeah, it's not here to create, it's here to leave.

Tracey: 50:21

It's here and I just feel like it's such a benevolent universe and there's so many, you know, like what's, what's, what's transpiring now is so to me wanting that reconnection. I try to remember that you know, like, um, it really is all working to our benefit and again, so much support and we can ask for that. Yeah beautiful.

Lucy: 50:59

Well, it was really really amazing to hear you talk on this. I really feel like you have such mastery in this. Thank you.

Tracey: 51:10

I've had a lot of practice.

Lucy: 51:13

I think that's what it comes down to yeah, no, you really make it available. You hold a lot of wisdom in this and I love talking to you on this subject because you really make your wisdom available.

Tracey: 51:28

Thank you, that's that's what I really want to do. I want to help people. I know what I've been through myself and I want to show people that you know it is um, it is manageable and again, the way you just have to move through it and there's so much love and so much that is offered to you when you choose the courage and you choose that path. You know that opens up for you and again it just is loving the self back into wholeness and you know it feels scary in the moment but it's just like you move through it and you feel so much better once you do. You know.

Lucy: 52:22

That's it, and I remember you talking about when you wake up, kind of checking in with how you are, and that, for me, is where I open to it, if I remember that practice, that kind of go-to daily practice about, okay, who am I right now, where am I?

Lucy: 52:42

I am and open to listening in this moment just to what is chiming in my body, what is chiming in my system. Where is my attention being called? Can I go and sit with it? And I know that's my opportunity to allow things to move and be healed without needing to manifest during my day, so that I can actually have a reaction triggered in me that will get the same energy moving in my system as if I did my check-ins and stopped and listened. And I do notice that if I have fear running that, doing that daily check-in, I will drift away from the practice without really noticing, I'll blind myself to it and it's all just a kind of intelligent system that's trying to steer me away from opening, listening and facing what's there and ready to be felt. So, yeah, thank you. Oh my gosh, we could talk about this for another three hours.

Tracey: 53:43

There is so much more of this topic.

Lucy: 53:46

I have a feeling we're going to revisit it and open other layers of this out, but I'm just so glad that we opened the book. You too, Thank you. Thanks, love, Tracy Minan. Thank you so much.

Tracey: 54:02

Thank you, lucy, I appreciate you.

Lucy: 54:06

You too Phenomenally so.

Tracey: 54:12

I don't want you to miss your, your, your thing, so I want to let you go.